


The Sliding Doors Hypothesis

by lizwontcry



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-11-03
Packaged: 2018-04-11 13:32:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4437278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizwontcry/pseuds/lizwontcry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Penny makes a split decision in the car on the way to Vegas to either go through with marrying Leonard, or not marrying Leonard. Her choice has repercussions that reverberate through her entire life, and in her relationship with Sheldon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Please see next chapter for author's note!**

*****

It's kind of funny, really, you know, the way life can totally be awesome and amazing one second, and then completely suck the next second. When Leonard told me about the chick he made out with the summer he was gone on the ship...I wasn't shocked or whatever. Leonard's already proven in the past that he's not the most faithful of boyfriends. It's rather ironic, actually, since he's constantly worried about me cheating on him, which I would obviously never do. Now that I think about it, he's a pretty big dillhole sometimes. And yet, somehow I find myself sitting shotgun in a car he's driving to Vegas so we can get married in the middle of the night. Hmm...there's definitely something wrong with this picture.

The car is eerily silent now. I know Leonard's thinking about how massively he messed up our plans this evening. I'm pondering what I want to do now. I was so stoked about finally marrying him and starting our new life together, but now I find myself questioning our entire relationship. What else is he hiding from me? Did he do more than just kiss that girl on the ship? Has he really waited almost an entire two years to tell me about it? I just can't believe it. Honestly, it's not even the kiss that bothers me that much. It's the fact that all these years, Leonard has been such a dick about me even having a conversation with a man, and yet I can't trust him to be away from me for a long period of time without something like this happening. The more I think about it, the madder I get. I mean, really, who does he think he is?

I know I just told Leonard to keep driving, but now I'm pondering all my other options. He keeps looking over at me, maybe expecting me to tell him everything's okay, or possibly waiting for me to have a temper tantrum. I won't satisfy him with either one of those things. I will say nothing, because right now? Right now, I _feel_ nothing.

We're getting closer to Vegas. And while it is actually one of my favorite places in the world, I suddenly have no urge to be there. And if nothing else, I always go with my gut.

"Turn around," I finally say. "Turn around the car; let's go home."

Leonard's face totally changes. It goes from relieved but nervous to completely devastated. It's not my intention to make him feel this way-I do love the guy, after all-but he's the one who felt like he needed to cleanse his soul or something by telling me what he did. He's opened the floodgates of the many reasons why we shouldn't get married; why I was always so hesitant to marry him in the past. In a way, it's a relief. I want to be with a man who can eat ice cream without gastrointestinal distress, is that too much to ask?

"Penny, come on, let's talk about it. You really want to end this because of a kiss? That's so unfair!" It's so like Leonard to just totally miss the point.

"No, it's not because of a kiss, Leonard. It's about trust. It's about your insecurities and how you're always so worried about me being faithful when it's you who can't behave yourself when you've had too much to drink. It's how you snore at night in bed. It's about your relationship with your mother and how that relates to me. It's how you eat pizza." I'm really getting worked up now. How have I not seen all these things before? Am— _was_ —I so blindly in love with him that I managed to look past most of his faults? Well, that's over now. I'm done.

"What's wrong with the way I eat pizza?!" Leonard exclaims.

"With a fork? Like, who does that?" I can't believe I used to think it was endearing, of all things.

"Civilized people! I'm already taking a risk by eating the pizza in the first place, can I at least eat it on my own terms?"

Well, this is a ridiculous fight. "It's not the damn pizza, Leonard. It's you and it's me and it's the problems we've always had. The kiss was just the straw that broke the camel's back. Now turn this car around or don't, but if you don't, once we get to Vegas, I'm hitching a ride with the first person who volunteers."

Leonard looks conflicted, like he's trying to decide if I'm serious or not. Ultimately, I know he's going to do the right thing. He's not a bad guy. He's just not the guy for me, and I'm so glad to finally realize this.

Sure enough, at the next exit, Leonard puts on his turn signal and exits, does a U-Turn, and gets back on the highway going back to Los Angeles. For some reason, this makes me a little sad. It's really over. We are not getting married.

Leonard is quiet. I'm waiting for the shoe to drop, because I know he has plenty of things to say. Finally he says, "So that's it? One kiss and you're not going to fight for us? Nine years and this is what it takes to end it?"

I mean, he kind of has a point, but it's not black and white like that. It's all the little things, and it's nothing. But it just _feels_ wrong, and I don't know how to explain it in a way that will satisfy Leonard. He'll want facts and scientific data to back up all my claims, but I don't work that way. I rely more on my feelings, and that's always been one of our biggest problems.

"Fight for us? I've fought for us for years," I say, trying to stay strong. "I've tried convincing myself that we were meant for each other, when really, all we had in common was sex, a love of Quentin Tarantino movies, and living across the hall. That's not enough for a lifetime, Leonard, I'm sorry. I need more. You kissing that girl tells me that you know something's not right about this, either. So, yeah, this _is_ what it takes to end it." It's kind of brutal, but it's true.

I'm not going to tell you that I have the last word, because there is still a 3 hour drive back home to sit in the car and argue. We throw our worst at each other, apologize, cry, and even stop on the side of the highway to make out for a few minutes, but by the time we get home, it's over. I'm devastated and hurt and angry, but mostly relieved. This is the right thing to do. We both need to stop using each other as safety nets and find our own paths.

When we get back to the apartment, we sit in the car for a few minutes, contemplating the journey we've just been on. Then we climb the stairs wearily and don't bother saying good night or good bye. It's 6:00 in the morning. I take off my make-up, brush my teeth, curl up in bed and cry myself to sleep.

I'm so groggy when I do eventually wake up. I wonder why I have this throbbing headache for a second, and then it hits me like a train-Leonard and I broke up last night. Oh, man. It hurts in every possible way. So I don't even bother looking at my phone; I don't want to talk to anyone until I've had proper time to get the worst of this desperate sadness out of me. I have a whole afternoon (since it was past noon before I could make myself roll out of bed) of feeling sorry for myself planned. This entails: ice cream, wine, and a whole season of Sex and the City.

Somewhere around dinner time, I decide enough is enough. I get up from the floor, throw the two (okay, three) empty bottles of wine away, and take a shower. A long one. After I get out and put some clothes on to try to resemble a functioning human, I finally check my phone to see if Leonard has tried to call. He hasn't. I wonder what he's been doing today. And then I realize I don't particularly care. That's the freedom of break-ups.

I do, however, have a text from Amy, from last night.

_P - I broke up with Sheldon. I don't know if it was the right thing to do but I just couldn't stand it anymore. Please call me ASAP! - A_

Oh, man, I am the worst bestie. This is bad. Very, very bad. I immediately call Amy and apologize over and over again for not calling her sooner. I don't mention my news-only one break-up at a time for now. Amy assures me it's okay. She actually sounds...happy.

"It's really fine," Amy says after I apologize for the tenth time. "This will be good for us. Well, for _me,_ actually. I love Sheldon, and I know he loves me, too. But I need more from him. He can't make out with me for longer than three minutes without bringing up some dumb TV show. I have needs too, Penny!"

"Of course you do, Ames," I say. She's a lot more patient than I am. She's been with Sheldon for five years and he's barely made it out of puberty yet. "You deserve someone who can focus on you, and you only."

Look, I love Sheldon, he's one of my best friends. But as Amy has been finding out for a long time, he is a crappy boyfriend. Amy gave it her best shot, and Sheldon's been doing so much better, but ultimately...I don't blame her for calling it off. Every girl has their breaking point. As I know all too well. I kind of want to tell Amy about my news, but she has enough to deal with right now.

"Hey, can you do me a favor?" Amy asks.

"Of course. What do you need?"

"Can you go check on Sheldon, please? And text me later to tell me how he's doing. I just...need to know."

Ugh, that potentially means I have to see Leonard again tonight, and that sucks. But Amy hardly ever asks me for anything, and she's having a bad night.

"Yeah, I'll go do that now," I say. Amy thanks me and sighs.

"Well, I'm going to bed," Amy says sadly.

"Good idea. It'll get easier, Amy, I promise." Actually, it probably won't get easier. It'll probably be a lot harder. For both of us. I remember the last time Leonard and I broke up-I never got over it. The circumstances are different now, though. The stakes are higher. I mean, we were one car ride away from getting married, for crying out loud.

Amy and I hang up and I sit motionless on my couch for a minute. I have to go across the hall and risk seeing Leonard and I really don't want to. But I do want to see Sheldon, actually. I care about him, and even if he can be an emotional robot, I know he loves Amy. I have no idea what kind of Sheldon I'll encounter when I go in there, though. Well, I guess it's time to find out.

I take a deep breath, exhale, and march across the hall. The door's unlocked, so I take a chance and go on in. Thankfully Leonard's not in the living room. Sheldon, however, is. And he's staring blankly at the TV, which is not even on. Uh-oh.

I sit down next to Sheldon. I want to take his hand, but I know how he feels about unnecessary contact.

"Sheldon?" I say softly. He finally turns to me and seems to come back to Earth for the moment.

"Penny. Hello."

"Hi, honey. Listen, is Leonard around?"

"He's spending the night at Raj's. Apparently he doesn't want to be anywhere in the radius of you tonight. I take it that means you two did not get married."

I nod. "That's right. It's... complicated."

Sheldon scoffs. "Penny, I'm going to receive the Nobel Prize in physics someday. _That's_ difficult. That's complicated. Relationships are not complicated."

"Oh, yeah? What are they, then?" I ask, curious to hear what he has to say on the subject.

Sheldon actually looks stumped. "Hmm, that is a good question, Penny. I've never given it much thought, I suppose. While I did enjoy Amy's company and our make-out sessions and date nights, I mostly saw our relationship as a... burden."

I am surprised to hear him say this.

"Wow, Sheldon, that's really how you see Amy? You've literally been with her for five years, and that's how you summarize your time together?" I know Sheldon pretty well at this point, and I'm not fooled by this casual dismissive thing he's pulling on me. I just want him to maybe admit that he's taking this break-up harder than it appears.

Sheldon shrugs. "It was fine while it lasted. A fascinating experimented I conducted on the nature of relationships from beginning to end."

"Interesting," I say. "And that's your entire perspective on the situation? You don't have any other feelings about it?"

"I'm not a hippie, Penny-of course I don't have any other feelings about it. You keep asking me these questions; what kind of answer would satisfy you?"

_A true answer,_ I think to myself, but I'm also kind of wondering why it matters so much to me. If Sheldon wants to be in denial, let him be. it's not really my problem. Except... for some reason, I want to get to the candy-coated center of his genius-covered heart.

"I don't know, Moonpie, I just think you should let yourself be sad. Amy was in your life for a long time and it's okay to be sad and angry and every other emotion you hardly ever let yourself feel."

Sheldon rolls his eyes and doesn't answer. I'm a little frustrated; usually I am so good in these kinds of situations. My friends in high school would always come to me for relationship advice. I know Sheldon isn't like most people, but surely he has some kind of pain buried deep inside of him somewhere.

I sigh, and get up to pace around the apartment. Sheldon watches me go back and forth, and we're at some kind of weird standstill. In the kitchen, I get myself a bottle water out of the refrigerator, take the cap off, and I'm about to take a sip when something catches my eye. Oh...em...gee. That is _not_ what I think it is! Is it?

I rush over to Sheldon's desk and I halfway expect him to try to beat me to it, but he's not moving. He watches with interest as I look at the shiny object on his desk by his computer. It's a ring. A beautiful ring. An engagement ring! Wow.

I place the ring back on his desk and walk slowly back to the couch, where Sheldon has not moved an inch. "Sheldon... were you going to propose to Amy tonight?"

Sheldon nods slowly.

"And you didn't get to because Amy broke up with you first?"

Sheldon nods again. Oh, my goodness. If Amy knew Sheldon was going to ask her to marry him, she would have exploded. Like, total spontaneous combustion. This is crazy.

I take his hand. He doesn't even cringe like he usually does. Progress.

"Sweetie, this is kind of huge."

"Let me assure you, this is not huge," Sheldon says, but he's looking more and more devastated as the seconds pass by. "The planet is huge. Space is huge. Proposing is not huge."

"Well, when you put it that way, of course it's not," I say patiently. "Look, you can probably still propose to her, and soon. She'll get over this, Sheldon. Amy loves you and you love her. I'm sure this is a temporary set-back and you'll get back together before you know it."

As I say this, something inside of me just plain _hurts_ —and it's not just because I feel bad for Amy and what she's missing out on. To tell you the truth—oh, this is so embarrassing—ever since Sheldon and I did that test to see if we could fall in love, something's been… off with me. I've been seeing him in a different light. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not "in love" with him or whatever, but it's something. A crush, perhaps, which is ridiculous; I haven't had a crush since high school! But I'm starting to notice all the things I dig about him. He has so many quirks and I've always tried to embrace them instead of judge them (much), but these days, I am finding them just plain endearing. Maybe that's another good reason why I didn't want to marry Leonard. Subconsciously, I just want someone else. It's that simple.

Of course, I would never act on it. Amy is my best friend, and there's no way I'd do that to her. Probably. And besides, like I said, he would be a terrible boyfriend. I'm used to a certain kind of intimacy that would be very hard for him, and on the other side, he would be quite impatient with my lack of academic intelligence. It would not be a good fit. But that doesn't stop me from thinking about it. Pondering it, if you will.

Sheldon shrugs. "Perhaps. But I'm not sure I want to renew my relationship agreement with Amy Farrah Fowler, to be quite honest."

"But... you were just about to propose to her, Sheldon. Now you don't even want to be in a relationship?"

Sheldon nods slowly. "I have had several hours to review the events of this evening, and I have come to a conclusion. I believe that I bought the ring simply because Amy was mad at me and I wanted her not to be. On further reflection, Amy has been eager to take our relationship in a direction I'm not comfortable with, and actually, am quite relieved that I don't have to engage in it anymore."

Oh, wow. I feel a sudden wave of sadness for Amy. I am sure this is not what she had in mind when she wanted "a break."

I lightly touch Sheldon's knee. He doesn't react, so I don't move it. "I understand, sweetie. Relationships are hard. We're probably both better off alone. You know, I've always thought we have similar commitment issues that Leonard and Amy never truly understood about us."

"Yes, now that you mention it... over the years, I have often felt that you and I have a peer bond that I don't have with anyone else, nor want with anyone else." Sheldon looks deep in thought. "In fact, although you don't have many of the qualities that Amy possesses, you have different ones that I have come to depend on and appreciate."

Oof. That ache is back. Sometimes-not all the time, but sometimes-Sheldon has the ability to surprise me. And I'm not easily surprised.

"I know what you mean, actually," I say, my heart beating rapidly. Hell, while we're sharing... "I've come to think of you as my best friend, but maybe it goes deeper than that."

You know, it's refreshing to actually be honest. To not dance around these feelings that possibly we both have. Of course, we've both had one of the worst nights of our lives, so maybe we're not thinking clearly. But right now, none of that matters. I can only see what's right in front of me-what's been in front of me for nearly nine years.

"Penny, I admit I'm not the smartest person when it comes to relationships, and I am definitely not as adept in the art of intimacy as you are, but I think... I think I would like to participate in romantic activities with you."

I smile. "Sheldon, are you talking about dating me?"

Sheldon nods. "Yes, I do believe that is what I want to do."

"You know we'd just be rebounds for each other, right? I mean, that's what everyone will say, anyway."

"I am not particularly familiar with that term, and I am also aware that we will cause quite a stir in our peer group. But if you will agree to this... experiment of sorts, then I do not care what anyone else thinks."

I am not surprised he thinks of this as an experiment, because that's what it would be. I have no idea what we'd be like as a couple. It might be a disaster! But I am so utterly heartbroken and lost that this seems like the best idea the two of us can come up with right now.

"Let's do it," I say. "I mean, yes, it's crazy and impulsive but we owe it to ourselves to at least explore the possibility, right?"

Sheldon already looks confused. Oh, this is going to be an adventure.

"I don't know if I owe myself anything, but I suppose you're right, Penny-this is rather impulsive of us. And to make it even more so..."

To my surprise, Sheldon scoots closer to me, and suddenly he's kissing me. I'd be lying if I said this was shocking, because I somewhat expected it and kind of really wanted it, but it's still a hell of a ride. I'm kissing Sheldon! He's kissing me! He's not a bad kisser, either. He could use some help with his technique, but Amy has taught him well. Oh, god, _Amy!_ I try my hardest to put her out of my mind. She's the one who wanted the break. That's a flimsy excuse and I know it, but yet... I just can't stop this train from coming.

When we part, I say, "Wow, that was… good. But I should go. Let's just press pause and not get to all the good stuff in the first night, okay?"

"Good thinking," He says. "I'll see you tomorrow, I presume?"

"Um, yes, let's do that," I say nervously for some reason. "See you tomorrow." Because I have no willpower and can't help myself, I kiss him again. I know Sheldon is a virgin and I know that I have a long road ahead of me, but I can't help but want him more than I've ever wanted anything in my life. A little dramatic, but that's how I feel. Hopefully it'll wear off after a good night's sleep, because feeling like this is not good for my sanity.

I pull away reluctantly, smile at him, and get out of the apartment and into my own before I do something stupid. Well, that ship has sailed-something more stupid. Things are changing, and I have no idea if I've just made the biggest mistake or best decision of my life.

*****

_Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,_  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood  
And looked down one as far as I could  
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

_Then took the other, as just as fair_  
And having perhaps the better claim,  
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;  
Though as for that the passing there  
Had worn them really about the same, 

_And both that morning equally lay_  
In leaves no step had trodden black.  
Oh, I kept the first for another day!  
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,  
I doubted if I should ever come back. 

_I shall be telling this with a sigh_  
Somewhere ages and ages hence:  
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —  
I took the one less traveled by,  
And that has made all the difference. 

**\- The Road Not Taken, Robert Frost -**


	2. Chapter 2

_APRIL 2026_

There was something about the way the sun was shining through her dressing room window that made Penny sadder than she already was, and she didn't like it. It was almost like the sky was mocking her. Like it was saying, "The sky is clear, the day is young, be happy!" Well, that was easy for the sky to say. She used to love the sun-even though she grew up in Nebraska, she was a California girl at heart. But now, she certainly preferred rainy days. They matched her overall disposition.

A knock on the door interrupted her deep thoughts, and before Penny could say "enter," the product assistant, a short, round man with unkempt, long, brown hair the color of a turd, walked in and said, "Mrs. Hofstadter, someone is here to see you. He didn't mention his name. And you're needed on the set in 20 minutes."

Penny scoffed. Before the PA could leave, she said, "Excuse me, do not, under any circumstances, address me as Mrs. Hofstadter again, am I making myself clear? It is Penny and only Penny. Oh, and do not come into this room again until you hear me say 'Come in.' Now please leave, and tell my guest to come in. "

The PA nodded and made a hasty escape, looking less scared and more bored, not the effect Penny was going for, actually. As her star began to steadily rise, Penny became more and more of a diva every day. She never wanted to be that girl, but it happened anyway. A lot of things aren't what she thought they'd be anymore.

There was another knock at the door. Penny was expecting her assistant to enter with her dry-cleaning, and she was about to say "Come in!" But again, before she could, she was interrupted. By another knock. And then a third knock.

No...way. She didn't know anyone else in the world who knocked like that. Her heart skipped a beat as she finally said, "Come in!" Because if it was who she thought it was, he was maybe the only person in the world she genuinely wanted to see.

And there he was. Standing in her doorway was Sheldon Cooper. 10 years had passed since she'd last seen him, but he didn't look much different. Wiser, maybe. More handsome than she remembered, for sure. It was so unfair how men only got better looking as they got older, Penny always thought. But whatever it was about Sheldon, Penny was drawn to him like a magnet. She hopped out of her chair and bounded over to him. And before any words were spoken, they were hugging. Sheldon didn't even protest, just clung to her like it was the most natural thing in the world. She didn't even know she missed the guy that much.

"Oh, Moon Pie! It is so good to see you. What are you even doing here?!"

"Hello, Penny. As you know, only my MeeMaw calls me that. And since she passed away a few years ago, it sparks a particular kind of inexplicable sadness in me that I would rather not experience."

It wasn't often anymore that Penny truly felt like an asshole-she tended to be numb to that feeling these days-but in that moment, she really did.

"Oh, Sheldon, I'm so sorry. Don't worry, I will remove the word from my vocabulary."

"Thank you. Now, to answer your question as to why I'm here, well, I was asked to be a consultant on a new movie they're making about the Higgs Boson, so I'm in town."

Penny nodded. "I guess your stock has gone up since you won the Nobel Prize, right? Oh, when I heard, I was so freakin' proud of you. I'm sorry I couldn't be there, but I'm sure Amy was happy enough for an army of people."

"Oh, yes," Sheldon replied. "She was like a giddy school girl. However, we terminated our marriage agreement two years ago, so there's no telling what's making her happy now.

Penny was truly shocked. And then just plain sad, and embarrassed… how long had it been since she'd talked to Amy? Was she really so caught up in the grind of Hollywood crap that she hadn't even bothered to call her old best friend for five minutes?

"I'm so sorry, Sheldon, I had no idea. How have you been doing?"

"Penny, I have a Nobel Prize, I am one of the smartest people in the country, and I am rich. I am perfectly fine."

Penny laughed. Same old Sheldon. Man, had she always missed him this much? She remembered back when she and Leonard first moved to San Francisco and how bad she felt leaving Sheldon behind, but that was so long ago. It was so unsettling, this feeling of blurriness when it came to the things that used to be important to her.

"Anyway, I saw your last Golden Globe speech. The movie was pure drivel, but it was nice to see you up there accepting an award. So I wanted to come and congratulate you on your continued success." Sheldon looked thoughtful. "You deserve it, Penny. You worked very hard to get where you are today. I'm proud of you."

It had been so long since Penny received a genuine, heartfelt compliment (and he was right; the movie was, in fact, pure drivel) from someone who didn't want anything from her, she almost didn't know how to respond.

"That's very sweet of you, Sheldon. Thank you very much. It's nice that since we've last seen each other, we've both enjoyed success in our careers," Penny said, and they both nodded sadly. It was funny; they both achieved what they'd been envisioning for themselves since childhood, and yet… at what cost?

"Well, thank you so much for coming to see me, sweetie. I'm about to be called on set but maybe we can have dinner tonight? I'd love to hear more about the movie you're working on and, well, everything," Penny said.

Sheldon nodded. "Yes, let's catch up. I'll pick you up if you just text me your address. And dress nicely, it's a fancy restaurant."

Penny's breath caught in her throat. Sheldon was going to pick her up? He had a car? And they were going to a nice place? This was not a Sheldon she was used to… but she liked it.

"Sounds great," Penny said, trying to smile like the world famous popular movie star she was known as, instead of the broken, bitter woman she had become. She had a feeling Sheldon was hiding behind an exterior of pain as well, but she may never know. He wasn't the type to confide in her, after all. Well, dinner was going to be interesting, for sure.

"Well, I better get back to the job," Sheldon said. "It's nice to know that all Hollywood sets are dens of depravity and disgustingness, not just the one I'm on currently. See you this evening, Penny."

"Bye, Shelly," she said, and watched him go. Well, that happened. What a nice surprise for her afternoon. At that exact moment, he cell phone vibrated.

 _We need to talk about Caroline tonight,_ Leonard had texted her. _Please call me. Don't make me beg._

Penny exhaled. She closed her eyes and thought about that moment so many years ago, when she made the split decision in the car on the way to Vegas. She could have made him turn the car around, but she didn't. What was a few kisses, really? No big deal. That was just the beginning, however. The beginning of the end.

Penny texted back, _Tomorrow._ She knew they had plenty to talk about, but it could wait until tomorrow. Tonight, she was going to see her Moon Pie.

*****

A few hours later, Penny was putting on her make-up when she heard Sheldon honking outside. Of course he wouldn't come to the door; why would she even think that? But before she could finish applying her lipstick, there were the three knocks and her name. It was nice to see that some things would never change.

She finished with her lipstick and ran to open the door. "Hi, honey. Come on in, I need to finish my make-up." Sheldon sighed, but followed her inside.

"This is a lovely home," Sheldon said, taking a hard look at his surroundings. He was lying; Penny was renting a one bedroom, one bathroom house that cost her more a month than a mortgage on a mansion back in Nebraska. It was fine, though. Very cozy. It allowed her to be a hermit and curl up in the window seat and read when she was trying to escape her reality.

"Thanks," Penny replied. "I rent it whenever I'm in town. Leonard and Caroline-our daughter-live in San Francisco." Sometimes the only thing Penny missed when she was away from San Francisco was her huge, amazing house. Which was a problem.

"Yes, the last time I saw Leonard, he showed me pictures of your daughter. She is very pretty," Sheldon said, looking genuine.

Penny nodded, feeling a wave of sadness all over again. Caroline, her gorgeous nine year old daughter. Constantly caught in the crossfire of Penny and Leonard's tattered relationship, and as a result, was a bit of a challenge. Well, "bit" might have been an understatement.

"Thank you, she is. Speaking of Leonard, he never told me he saw you recently. When was that?"

"Oh, well, December 15th, 2024. 10:42 AM to 12:01 PM. Approximately a year and a half ago. I stopped in San Francisco on my book tour and we had coffee. He didn't tell you?"

Penny shook her head. "No, but that doesn't surprise me. He doesn't tell me a lot of things." Before Sheldon could look uncomfortable from all the personal talk, she said, "Well, where do you want to go for dinner? You said it was fancy, but maybe somewhere small and more on the down low? I'm not in the mood for paparazzi tonight."

"Well, I had selected an eating establishment based on cleanliness and efficiency of the wait staff, but I had somewhat of an epiphany on the way here-why don't we just stay in and order something? As I get older, the noise and atmosphere of so-called 'hip' restaurants seem to get more and more irritating."

Penny smiled. It sounded amazing, actually, a dinner alone with her old friend Sheldon. She wanted to pick his brain, anyway-he was being so calm and courteous and adorable. What had happened over the years to change him so drastically? Obviously he was the same guy she used to know and love, but something was very different about him. She was intrigued. "I would love to stay in, Sheldon. I'll order us some pizza. You do still eat pizza, don't you?"

"Of course. I'm not an animal. I do have to say, however, that you look absolutely stunning in that dress. I have no doubt that if we were to go out this evening, every man in the room would be staring at you in admiration and lust."

Well, that was the last thing she ever expected to come out of Sheldon Cooper's mouth, but it was maybe one of the best compliments she'd ever received. As she approached her forties, Penny still looked good, but it no longer bought her what it used to. Men looked at her differently now, and the innocence and beauty of youth was passing her by. Man, getting old sure was a bitch.

"Thank you, Sheldon, that is so nice of you to say." She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and he blushed. He was so cute when he blushed.

An hour later, Penny and Sheldon sat at the small kitchen table, sharing a pizza and some Dr. Pepper. Penny would have preferred a glass of wine, but those days were behind her now. She was in recovery. Some days felt impossible to get through another second without taking a drink, but she was determined. Something in her life had to go the way she was planning it to. _Something._

The two of them ate their pizza and caught up on all the small talk they'd been missing out on, carefully avoiding addressing either of their shattered marriages and personal lives. When Sheldon had eaten his second slice, he turned to Penny and said, "Penny, I have to confess something-I'm not just here because of the movie I'm consulting for, actually. I had many other offers in many other places, but I chose this one because I knew you were in L.A."

"Oh, yeah? Why is that?" Penny's heart raced a little faster than usual. Sheldon was not following the script, and that made her nervous.

Sheldon cleared his throat. "Well, I know your relationship with Leonard has more or less ended, and while I always knew it was doomed from the beginning, I had this urge to see you. I don't know why, but I felt like I needed to make you a warm beverage and rub your feet. And I hate other people's feet, you know that."

Penny sighed. "Is this about the TMZ thing from last month?"

Sheldon shook his head. "Of course not. I just-"

"Come on, Sheldon, is it the TMZ thing or not?"

"Okay, yes, it was the TMZ thing. I, of course, don't read that filth, but Raj emailed me a link. Penny, I'm sorry this has happened to you, and I want to be here for you any way I can. You're… you're one of my oldest friends, and while we've let distance and time keep us apart, I still consider you one of my best friends. Please, tell me what I can do for you."

Penny rubbed her temples. She should have known that was the reason why he wanted to see her.

About a month ago, Penny came home to San Francisco, unannounced. Caroline was away at school and she wanted to talk to Leonard alone, maybe try one last time to salvage their, as Sheldon described, doomed relationship. They had a child together, and they'd been through so much for so long. But when she got to the house-the house that she had bought after her fourth movie, "Black Beauty," scored box office records-Leonard was in bed. With her. Leonard had assured Penny over and over again that his affair with Amanda Ray was over a long time ago, but there she was, tanned and toned naked body on top of Leonard's pasty and flabby one. Penny's still not sure who threw the first punch-it was probably her, but she always maintained it was Amanda-and somehow they both ended up in county jail for the night. Penny's lawyer made it all go away, but not before the whole thing ended up on TMZ.

To be honest, Penny didn't really care about Leonard enough to fight anyone over him, but the fact that he brought Amanda to the house infuriated her. He was always assuring her it was over with Amanda, with the other girls she had known about, and the ones she didn't know about. But that was okay-for the past couple of years, Penny had her own lover, a very discreet actor whom she wasn't in love with, but who gave her the intimacy she occasionally needed. It was the best form of revenge in her eyes.

Penny knew after that night, there was nothing worth saving. Caroline probably would have preferred she and Leonard divorced, anyway. None of her friends' parents were together anymore, after all. So since the "incident," Leonard and Penny had finally decided their marriage was a disaster, and now only spoke through their lawyers. If only she had made him turn the car around instead of going to Vegas…

"Sheldon, you're sweet, but I'm not sure there's anything you can do. Leonard and I just don't love each other anymore. We haven't in a long time."

Sheldon reached across the table and took Penny's hand, which startled her. It was such an intimate gesture, something she didn't know Sheldon was capable of, not to mention the way it made her feel. She hadn't seen him in so long, and yet this one simple touch sent shivers down her spine. What was that about?

"I know you," Sheldon said, looking into her eyes. "I know that you think you don't need anyone. I know you think I'm not capable of comforting anyone but myself. But trust me, Penny, I've changed. I mean, of course I'm not a hippy or anything, but I now understand why intimacy is important. And though we have been separated for many years, I know you need someone who gets you. So, please, talk to me. I want to listen."

For so many years, Penny was convinced she was all alone. She didn't need anybody or anything. But here was a friend from her past who was offering to be there for her, and she was not in a place to deny how much she needed that. So the two of them moved to the couch. Sheldon gently put his arm around her, and Penny cried. She cried for an hour about how she let Leonard ruin her life and turn her into this emotionless robot, and how her daughter Caroline hated her and was acting out at school so bad they had to put her in a special program at the boarding school, and how hard everything had gotten, even though her career was in a place she'd all but given up on ten years ago. Sheldon listened, never interrupted her, and it was the first time in a long time that Penny felt like someone actually cared about what she was saying.

When Penny was done crying, she accepted the cup of tea Sheldon insisted on making her.

"Thank you for this, Sheldon. It's been so long since someone has done this for me. I really appreciate it."

Sheldon nodded. "I'm glad you let yourself go, Penny. I must get back to the hotel now, however. Perhaps we can have lunch later in the week?"

Penny's heart sank. Of course he was leaving. Everyone does. But… she didn't want him to go. Not yet. And she wasn't going to pretend.

"What if you stayed, Sheldon? I'll sleep on the couch; it folds into a bed. I'll get you some clean sheets."

"Hmm, I suppose I can do that," he said, looking thoughtful. "I haven't actually checked into my hotel yet."

"Good," Penny said. And… "I want you to stay."

"I want to stay," Sheldon replied, looking into her eyes. It was so intense, Penny got goosebumps on her arms. What was this? Was it a huge mistake? Should she just have accepted his pity and let him go? She didn't want to let go. Sheldon was like shelter in the storm, and she needed him. And these days... she always got what she wanted.

Penny never did make it to the couch that night. In an unspoken agreement, the two of them shared her queen-sized bed, back to back, warm to each other's touch. Something was happening, but Penny didn't question it. For now, she'd just hold on and try not to let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Hello, friends. You've probably noticed by now that this story is a little different. I've always loved the movie Sliding Doors, and I kinda wanted to explore that concept with this story. What if Penny did break up with Leonard, and what if she didn't? It's just, for the first time in many seasons, it seems like there's finally an infinitesimal chance that Shenny could happen, what with Amy and Sheldon being on a break and maybe the break-up of Penny and Leonard. So here is my story, and I hope you like it. And for all you Shamy and/or Leonard fans out there...this story is not kind to them, so maybe let's agree to disagree and go our separate ways.
> 
> Thanks for reading! Reviews are encouraged and appreciated - except from people who have nothing to say but BOOO ThIS WiLL NEVaaR HAPPEn! I get it. I'm still writing it. Bye bye now.
> 
> One more thing - I can't promise this is going to be updated on a weekly basis or anything; I mean, it did take me like 2 months to write the first 2 chapters. But it will be worth it in the end.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few things!
> 
> A. I am sorry it's been so long, but I am so very busy with so many things. Thank you for your patience. This story keeps getting favorited and followed and it makes me think people still want to read it, so I will persevere! Yay.
> 
> B. In hindsight, first person might not have been the best tense to go with here, but I can't go back, and I'm sorry/not sorry.
> 
> C. Thank you so much for reading, and feedback is always appreciated.

Sheldon and I walk up the stairs, not really talking because we don't want Leonard to hear us if he happens to be nearby. Just before we got out of my car, we were discussing the pros and cons of going to the beach on vacation. Obviously, I'm all for it. I've been working out hardcore lately and I want to debut my (somewhat outrageous) new bikini to Sheldon and the rest of the world.

"I abhor the beach," Sheldon says, like I don't already know that. "I grew up five minutes from one in Galveston. It's dirty, it's loud, you get sand everywhere. Why would I ever want to go to a beach?"

Good question, actually. I have to think about this one. The obvious answer of "Because I want to and generally people compromise in relationships to make the other happy," probably wouldn't work with him. I mean, he makes compromises every day, don't get me wrong. But little ones. Like what flavor of ice cream we should have for dessert. The other reason I can offer is the promise of being frisky with me at the beach, in all our half-naked glory. But of course, that one probably won't work, either.

"Sweetie, I want to go to the beach. And I promise you, if you go with me for a whole three hours or more, I will take you to the comic book store, where we can spend an equivalent amount of time. If we don't spend all the time there, we can watch any Star Treks or Wars on Blu Ray for an entire afternoon." Which doesn't exactly sound like fun for me, but again… compromise.

Sheldon sighs. "Fine. I deem that an acceptable trade."

"Good," I say. "Do you want to come in for a moment?"

"Yes, I do," Sheldon says, and he follows me inside my apartment. As soon as the door closes behind us, he is pinning me against it, kissing me more passionately than the law should allow. Sheldon is a good kisser. He turns me on, and I know he's turned on, and then… it just ends. He stops kissing me, gives me this look of carnal desire, and walks out of my apartment. Every. Single. Time.

So here's what happens when you start dating someone you're very attracted to who has never gone past one and a half bases-you dream about them. A lot. In very compromising situations. And then you wake up in a pool of your own sweat and realize that, yes, it's true-you may never have sex again.

I mean, that's not the only thing I think about when I'm with Sheldon. We've actually started doing something I never knew was possible-dating. We go to restaurants, we go to movies, and apparently soon, the beach. He comes over for dinner and sometimes I get to make things that aren't hot dogs and spaghetti. We talk about everything. We're both from pretty rural places and share a lot of the same experiences growing up. Our siblings (well, our brothers) are both kind of screwed up. While his mother's faith is obviously extremely important to her, my mom is sort of the opposite. She never really cared what any of her children did, just as long as they were happy. Which very well may be the reason my brother is the way he is, but who's counting.

We don't have a lot of shared music in common, but we can always agree on Garth Brooks. I've started to give him an education on Radiohead and the other stuff I listen to, which surprisingly Sheldon doesn't hate. And I've started watching Doctor Who with him, as well. It's not… bad. I'd rather be watching something with a Kardashian in it, but I want to know more about the stuff Sheldon likes. He's trying, and so am I.

Another thing I've come to appreciate: Sheldon is just so sturdy. I love to lean against him, or put my head on his shoulder. He's like a rock or something. I wonder if our relationship will ever progress to real snuggling in bed-not even any funny business, although that… that would be nice, too.

Here's a random confession: I've been attracted to Sheldon for a long time, actually. I mean, it obviously wasn't love at first sight or anything-for a while, I thought he looked like a child trying to do an impression of an adult. That all changed when I saw him in a black suit for the first time. He looked like a man. A hot one. And even though that was when I was with Leonard, a tiny part of me started to wonder about Sheldon. Sometimes I'd give in and close my eyes and think about what it would be like to kiss him. Before Amy came along, I kind of wanted to be his first kiss. A little weird, right? I always got over it, but now I don't have to. We kiss. A lot! And it's so, so good, and I want more, and I'm used to getting what I want. But I know Sheldon isn't ready for that. Maybe he will be and maybe he won't, and that's something I'm going to have to deal with if I want to be in a relationship with him. Which I do, very much. He's a good guy-so smart and so interesting, if not a little strange and awkward and, well, somewhat annoying. So after our dates, I go home, I take a cold shower, and I go to bed and have these dreams that are so far from my reality.

We're not secretly dating, either. Okay, well, yes, we are, actually-I lied. It's been three pretty decent weeks and I know we have to tell Leonard and Amy what's up before they find out for themselves. And that's the plan; I don't feel right sneaking around behind everyone's backs. We've both been telling everyone that we're just so busy at work, or that I'm sick or that Sheldon's feeling anti-social lately (which is not the most unbelievable lie) and that's not cool. I want to do the right thing in this relationship. I want to be honest. Even if it's going to be the hardest thing I ever do, I want to make it right. Well, Sheldon does, anyway. We've had so many conversations where I'm on the fence and he wants to tell Leonard. See, when he wants to do the right thing and not lie forever like I'm inclined to do, it makes me feel all squishy inside. I never imagined feeling this way about Sheldon. It's so bizarre. But… so right.

For a week after we have the beach conversation, Sheldon and I talk about how exactly we should tell everyone. I want to tell them all at once. Sheldon wants us to do it individually. I have this fantasy that we're kissing in the hallway and everybody comes upstairs to hangout in Leonard and Sheldon's place and we're busted. Getting caught and having to quickly defuse a situation is more my thing than just coming clean before any trouble happens. But I am with Sheldon now, I'm trying to do the mature thing, I'm trying to keep this relationship on the straight and narrow, so I decide to go with Sheldon's wish to tell everyone individually. So, on a Sunday night, I come over while Sheldon and Leonard are watching the Walking Dead. I haven't talked to Leonard much since we broke up and he's been basically avoiding me-not that I blame him. I don't really have the urge to see or talk to him, either. It's unlikely we're ever going to renew our friendship, especially after Sheldon and I tell him our news. Who knows? Maybe he'll take it better than we think. (Probably not)

I come in and sit down quietly next to Sheldon. I want to hold his hand or touch him in some kind of way, but we've already agreed not to do that. This will be all business. In Walking Dead land, zombies are eating people and being noisy. Sheldon and Leonard both ignore me until a commercial comes on. Leonard glances at me and says, "Oh, hi, Penny."

"Yes, hello, Penny. Always nice to see you," Sheldon says.

"Can we help you?" Leonard asks somewhat smartass-ly. I used to come over and watch the Walking Dead with them every Sunday, without fail, and now I get a "Can we help you?" Leonard can be ice cold when he wants to be. Which does not bode well for us.

"Well, actually, Leonard, I have something to tell you," I say. Ideally I wouldn't have to tell him like this, but I want it to be over with; I wish I could clone myself and have the clone tell him so there's no weird emotions involved. That would be mean to do to my clone but whatever, it's a clone.

"Yeah?" Leonard says, looking interested in something I'm saying for the first time in three weeks. I know why. I know why, and I'm trying to not know why.

"Yes. Um, Sheldon, do you want to start?" I nudge him. I can't do this alone. Sheldon obviously looks uncomfortable, but damn, it was his idea in the first place.

"Yes, fine. Leonard, I know this may be a shock to hear, but Penny and I have decided to involve ourselves in a social peer grouping. We have been doing this for a few weeks, and wish to continue to do so. We know we won't get your blessing, as my mother would say, but we just wanted you to know." Sheldon says this all very fast. Leonard has no idea what just hit him.

"Excuse me?" Leonard says, in obvious disbelief. "You want to tell me that in English, Penny?"

I don't, but I do, anyway. "Leonard, Sheldon and I are dating. We're going to keep dating. We wanted to tell you because you deserve to know. It's been a few weeks. I'm sorry, but it's true." So there.

Leonard leans back in the loveseat, the one I've shared with him for many, many years, and doesn't say anything. I don't say anything. Sheldon doesn't say anything. For a moment, I wonder if we're stuck in a time continuum. That would probably suck.

Leonard finally speaks. "I should have known. You two always made me feel like I was missing out on something. I never knew what it was, but I guess it was an attraction. Maybe you didn't know it at first, but we all saw it." He sighs. I wait for him to continue, because I know he's not finished. Leonard's never finished. "So, yeah, I just never thought you'd do this to me." Ah, there it is. Well, at least it's out there now. "I mean, I have no idea why I ever thought this would work out between us. I'm… me, and you're so beautiful, and we were going to get married, and now you're with Sheldon."

I have never reacted well to guilt trips, and tonight is no exception. And something else is starting to occur to me, as well. Something I should have seen a long time ago.

"You know, Leonard, I don't think you've ever complimented me on something other than my beauty," I say, getting a bit worked up. "I'm actually a lot more than just my looks. I may not be as smart as you guys, but I have common sense, and I'm street smart, and I have great social skills-all things that have helped me get pretty far in life. I'm a good person, I'm loyal, I love my friends. I can make a pretty damn good steak. And I can milk a cow faster than anyone in Douglas County, Nebraska. What are you most sad about, anyway? Losing me, or losing your potential trophy wife?"

Leonard looks confused. "Well, forgive me, Penny, but I've never seen your… cow milking skills in action. And of course I know you're smart. You're an amazing person, inside and out. Yes, your beauty is what caught my attention at first, but I love everything about you. Please give me a little credit here."

I want to be mad at Leonard. I want to hate him. I want to have a justifiable reason to grab Sheldon and take him to my apartment and make out with him all night and not worry about Leonard's feelings. But the truth is, he's not a bad guy. He's just not the guy for me. And maybe Sheldon isn't either, but I have to find that out for myself.

I try to compose myself. Sheldon is sitting quietly in his spot, just kind of staring blankly at the TV. It would be nice if he could unfreeze himself and say something, but…

"You're right, Leonard. The point is, I'm sorry that this hurts you, but Sheldon and I are dating. Since we don't want to make you uncomfortable, we'll mostly be spending time together at my place. I don't expect you to accept us as a couple, but I hope you can find it in your heart to at least continue your friendship with us eventually."

Leonard snorts. "You've really got some nerve. We were literally in the car driving to Vegas to get married a month ago, and now you want me to 'accept' your relationship with my best friend? Are you on crack? No, no, it's fine-I'll move in with Raj. We've been discussing it lately, anyway. Don't expect me to be a part of this. I loved you, Penny. I've loved you since the day I met you, but that doesn't extend to your newest relationship. I don't want anything to do with it."

Now, this is the Leonard I was waiting for, actually. He's such a roller coaster of emotions, seriously. But, to be honest, I am somewhat relieved that he's, in a way, letting us off the hook. I know that sounds terrible of me, but it would be so much harder for Sheldon and I if Leonard was involved in our relationship, at least for now. It'll be nice to have some space. Yeah, I'm selfish, but everyone already knows that so I'm not too worried about it. Also, Leonard is pissing me off, and he's forgetting one very important detail.

"Well, Leonard, you should have thought of that before you got drunk and made out with a girl on the boat. You know what, I missed you every single day when you were gone. There was never a single thought in my mind that would have led to me cheating on you, even if I was drunk. So, fuck off with your acceptance. We don't need it, and frankly, we don't want it."

Sheldon seems energized by my anger. "And if that's how you feel, Leonard, fine," Sheldon said. "I'll consider the roommate agreement null and void once you have started your cohabitation with Raj."

Leonard throws an evil glare at Sheldon. "I never knew you were capable of this, Sheldon. Out of anyone else in the world, and it's you."

Sheldon doesn't reply. My heart breaks a little for my new boyfriend, because even though I won't miss Leonard very much, he was Sheldon's best friend and roommate. That's going to surely be rough for Sheldon. Oh, well, I'll do my best to be there to pick up the pieces.

Leonard looks surprised by this turn of events. I don't know what he was expecting.

"Can you do me a favor and get out of here for a while?" Leonard asks, and I see a flicker of pain in his eyes. My first instinct is to say no, this is Sheldon's place and we'll stay if we want, but I know Leonard needs to be alone to process what just happened. So I grab Sheldon and say, "Sure, we need to do laundry anyway. Grab your basket, Sheldon." Sheldon obediently gets his basket of laundry and we go back to my apartment so I can wrangle up my dirty clothes.

Here's something I recently found out: the door of the laundry room has a lock on it. Excellent for making out purposes. Maybe it's the adrenaline from telling Leonard about us, but a switch in Sheldon has been turned on while we wait for laundry. He is kissing me, and he is running his fingers through my hair, and his hands are everywhere (not that he really knows what to do with them), and I'm enjoying it, obviously, but I'm also a little worried. Is this what he wants, or is he just reacting to the situation? I mean, if it were up to me, we'd do it on dryer right here and now, but I know he's not ready for that.

So I decide to slow us down and say, "Sheldon… let's pace ourselves, okay? I mean, we still have to tell Amy. She's coming over tomorrow for lunch. We'll just say it. Rip the Band-Aid off. It can't be any worse than Leonard's reaction, right?"

Sheldon nods, and actually looks a little relieved. He detaches himself from me and visibly tries to compose himself. I hope this isn't going to happen a lot; sooner or later I'm not going to be capable of handling being the rational one in this relationship and clothes are going to go flying everywhere.

For the rest of the evening, we sit at the table in the laundry room and play cards. We are both exceptional Poker players, and it gets mighty competitive. We laugh a lot, and I can't believe this is my life. Everything is so different, and yet it feels so right.

As it turns out, we don't have to worry much about Amy's reaction. She seems, well, thrilled. I order pizza for us and in mid-bite, I tell her what's going on with Sheldon and I. I have no idea what she is going to say or do, but, well, she surprises me.

"Are you serious?!" She exclaims. Before she came over for lunch, Sheldon and I decided that it would be better for me to tell her alone. Sheldon did not argue with this plan.

"Well, yeah, Ames. I'm so sorry to tell you like this, but I didn't want you to find out-"

"No, it's-it's great, Penny. I am happy for you guys. I've always been a little jealous of your friendship with him because it seems like you just understand each other more. And now you get to explore that, and it's great. Really."

Okay… that's nice, but not exactly the kind of reaction I'd expect anyone to have after finding out their best friend is dating the man they dumped three weeks ago? I was expecting her to freak out and be angry and I'd have to diffuse the situation somehow. I'm good at that. I have to be, since I've mastered the "don't ask permission, ask for forgiveness" way of dealing with things.

"Amy… it's okay if you're upset about this. I know I would be in your position."

Amy looks at me strangely. Oh, no.

"Well, why are you doing it, then? If you feel bad about it and all."

"I don't know. It just kind of happened. We were both upset about our break-ups, and we found comfort in each other."

"Well, that's what I thought, Penny. I'm glad you have each other. In fact, it makes it easier for me. I was worried Sheldon wasn't going to give me the space I requested, but he has been very good about that. I was also concerned about him, and if he was going off the deep end buying a hundred cats like he did the first time we broke-up so many years ago. But this is better. This is good. You're looking after him and I can move on with my life. Great!"

She's saying the right things, but her face is telling another story. My heart sinks. This is not okay with her. This is even worse than Leonard's reaction somehow. And suddenly I am aware that my actions have consequences, and maybe I really messed up this time. Yet, at the same time, I don't want to stop seeing Sheldon. This is going to come back around to me someday. Karma and everything.

"Well, thank you for being cool about it," I say nervously.

"Of course. I know you're heartbroken about Leonard. You guys were so close to getting married, I can't believe it. How have you been?"

"I'm okay. It's for the best, you know?" And I have Sheldon, I think. He's the one who's keeping me sane here. Without him, I'd probably be curled up in the fetal position with a gallon of wine every night.

"I do know. I feel the same way."

"Are you planning to start seeing anyone soon?" I ask.

Amy nods. "I'm ready, Penny. I'm ready for intimacy, with someone who wants it, too. I wanted it to be Sheldon-oh, god, did I want it to be him-but it's not. Hey, maybe someday you'll get to make-out with him, too! You'll have to tell me all about it. He was so not a good kisser when we first started, but he has the loveliest lips, and after you guide him for a while, he'll figure it out."

Well, this is clearly not the time to tell her about our make-out adventures. Not this time, and maybe never.

When we're done with dinner, we chat about her work and mine, about Bernadette and Howard and everyone else, and we steer clear of anything having to do with Leonard and Sheldon. When she leaves, I sit down on the couch with a glass of wine, and briefly ponder what happens next. While I'm sad that Leonard took the news so badly (but not surprised), and bewildered at how Amy took it, I'm more excited about the next stage of my relationship with Sheldon. We've been on the first few dates, we've kissed, we've told our friends… and now it's just time for each other; time to see if what we have is more than just a rebound situation. I really think it is. I am pretty sure that I might be falling in love with Sheldon.


End file.
